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Friday, February 07, 2003
We're still waiting to be able to occupy the house. Sitting around my parents' house with nothing to do is really getting to me. I actually sat and watched TV today, which is highly unusual for me to do, unless I'm sick. Usually I have appointments with the TV. For example, Sunday nights at 9 on HBO- sometimes the Sopranos, sometimes Sex and the City. Tuesdays at 9, Frasier. NBC news after dinner. Other than that, we don't watch much TV, especially since high speed internet. Our driveway is finally being poured on Tuesday and hopefully the Certificate of Occupancy will come soon after. With any luck we'll actually be able to live at the house by next weekend.
I realized this week that I'm really disillusioned with my French class. Last semester I was always so happy to go there, but something has changed with our professor and I don't know what the deal is, but he's not teaching with the same degree of vitality that was so characteristic of him last semester. First he showed up with that awful hair and flirted with the older female students, which was disturbing, but now he's just weird. His presentation of the material is different, his personality is different. I can't help but wonder what must be happening to him in his personal life to cause such a change. He looks almost as if he would really rather be somewhere else. He's ''retired" and teaching this class is all he really does, according to him. After the last class meeting, I almost considered dropping the class. But then I thought, I can probably stick it out until the beginning of May when the semester is over. It's so weird- I've become a clock watcher in his class. That was never the case before. And I don't think that it's because I've lost interest in the language. I'm still very much interested. Taking this in combination with French diction is really going to help me when learning new French song literature. I can't wait until the next time I am able to travel to Paris. I guess I'm just really disappointed with the way the class is going. Another classmate of mine has also noticed a difference, so I guess I'm not the only one.
Tuesday, February 04, 2003
Well we had a victory today as far as the driveway is concerned. The contractor agreed to pay for more than half of the expense, which is great news for us. It's saving us a whole lot of money and we are extremely pleased about this latest development. This whole ordeal has been extremely taxing on both myself and Martin and we are really glad to finally have good news.
So much going on around us has been filled with sadness this week. First, with the Columbia. Then today, one of our neighbors from across the street passed away at 61 after suffering an awful lot from a myriad of medical problems. A couple of other people come to mind who I tend to worry about as well and I just start to wonder what is the point of it all. I was reminded of much happier moments earlier in my life while waiting in an office earlier in the day. I ran across a copy of the magazine, ''Highlights for Children." I first saw that magazine when I was a kid waiting in my dentist's office and my parents ordered it for me for years. I don't remember quite when I stopped getting the magazine but I just loved it. I saw that magazine today and saw how several of the features they used to have when I was a kid still exist in the magazine. Anyway, today I was reminded of the simple, happy pleasures that I experienced and I was reminded that it would be good to find more of those in my day to day life. I've let myself become too serious in the last few months while dealing with the construction of this house and all of the problems related to it. Actually, as I was recollecting with my husband how 2002 went, I realized that I dealt with several very serious issues through the entire year and how difficult the whole of last year was. I'm so hoping that this year will be better. I'm looking forward to my voice lesson tomorrow where I know for sure that during that hour tomorrow I'll be focusing on something that truly makes me happy. Hopefully as the week wears on, I'll have more good news regarding the house as well.
Sunday, February 02, 2003
We have been very productive in the last few days and we've managed to put a great majority of our house in working order. Martin took time off which was very helpful of course and my professors were extraordinarily accomodating. The whole house thing this last week has been so overwhelming that I sometimes forgot that I have other things happening in my life. Last night I finally decided to sit down and study for a while and make sure I totally don't blow things off and let me grades take a dive. I'd never forgive myself.
The outside of the house looks kinda messy at the moment due to all of the dirt all over the place. This weekend they formed the driveway and after it is inspected, they will pour the concrete and such. Hopefully soon after the driveway is completed, we will get the Certificate of Occupancy which will allow us to reside in the house.
Even though I really should have been way excited about working on the house this weekend, I have to say that I was extremely saddened by the events on Saturday morning. I spent most of Saturday feeling very sad about the way the crew of the Columbia died and especially sad for the families. I tried to think about how they were all gathered, probably looking at their watches, thinking about how their loved ones would be back in just minutes. And the kids. They must have been so excited to see their mother or father again. I really wonder why it is that these things happen. For a while, I've been reading Harold Kushner's book, ''Why Bad Things Happen to Good People.''
I also read Gary Zukav's ''Seat of the Soul'' book and with the philosophies I've read in these two books I've been trying to understand why these things happen- why should these children have to suffer? I just hate that.
I felt bad about the shuttle itself as well. They mentioned on TV somewhere that its' first flight was in 1984. I totally remember that. In fact, I was telling my dad that I remember that he had just bought his little Panasonic computer at about the same time as the Columbia was going on its voyage. I totally remember looking at the computer and asking my dad, what's that? And him saying, it's a computer. And me being like, how about that. Funny how far we've come. Anyway, this has all just been very sad, another one of those events where years from now, people will ask, do you remember where you were when the Columbia exploded?
