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Tuesday, September 30, 2003
 
Seeing a friend put up a new webpage reminded me that it has been a long time since I've visited my blog for an update. The truth of the matter is that I've been so busy between being a student and being a piano teacher that I've forgotten about certain things I used to do when I had more time online. It's okay that I don't have more time online than I do now, as my time online was getting to be too much.

Teaching eighteen students is a good thing. My bank account is healthier than it's been in a while but I have to admit that I get pretty tired at the end of the day. The good news is that I teach Monday through Thursday, not on Friday. All school activities also take place Monday through Thursday. Friday tends to be my ''me'' day where I recover, first of all from the craziness that would have been the first four days of the week, and also to catch up on things at home. And there are always lots of things to catch up on.

I enjoy teaching kids and most of the time things are well. I've experienced some injustice already with one family in particular. I spent so much time trying to help them in assorted ways only to have gone to their home twice and them not having paid me for services rendered. That wasn't good. Today, I felt a certain amount of strangeness in another house- they've been my customers for years but today I had a weird feeling and I'm not sure what to make of it.

Today was a weird day in general. Have you ever had one of those days where you just wake up, doubting parts of yourself? Usually I think that in certain areas of my life, I have good self-esteem, but this morning, it was very weird. The feeling has lasted all day. Not sure where this is coming from.

My dad seems to not be feeling well and this always sends me in a frenzy by itself. I always get very nervous when one of my parents seems to be sick. I guess from when we're little our parents are our ''foundation'' I guess. And when one of the parts of the foundation isn't that solid, it makes us feel shaky ourselves. I'm trying not to freak. I really am. I'm getting better at not freaking out.

Anyway, that's enough ranting for one day. I'm praying that tomorrow will be a better day. I always seem to write about things that aren't good. Last week, actually, last Wednesday, a piano student and her mother surprised me with a beautiful orchid. I had admired one that they have in their living room a few weeks prior and then they surprised me with one. I love it. It's gorgeous. It's so nice to be appreciated.